Official Document
The Stop Scurvy Pledge
A binding agreement between you and your gums.
I hereby solemnly swear:
- To respect citrus in all its forms.
- To acknowledge that potatoes are doing their best.
- To avoid becoming a cautionary tale in a medical textbook.
- To remember that pirates eventually figured this out.
- To never refer to orange juice as 'spicy water' (except as a joke).
June 27, 2026